Today, I feel pretty good.
Lately, I have been sleeping enough. It is a wonderful feeling. I go to bed at night between 9:30 and 11, whenever I start to feel tired. Then I get up with the kids at 6:30 for school. And I stay awake all day long. About two weeks so far, so this could be a new pattern for me. A successful and healthy pattern.
I joined Weight Watchers 11 weeks ago. It isn’t going great, but it is going. I have lost 9 pounds so far. It has been a bit up and down, but more down. I feel pretty good about it. I would really like for the weight to be coming off faster, but I am happy with any of it leaving, so I am not going to bitch about slow progress.
My depression has been a constant companion. I am getting a handle on it though. A lot of people turn to me when they need. Sometimes, it is my kids and they just need dinner or homework help. Sometimes, it is my sister and she needs a strong parent figure to help her with her problems. Sometimes, it is my husband and he needs positive reinforcement because his job is hard and sometimes life-sucking. Sometimes, it is my mother and she needs a strong parent, too. I can usually deal with most of them. But, I really can not continue to be the strong parent for my own parent. I have never had a strong parental figure myself. I have learned to live without one. I learned to do for myself and to be strong for myself, and for others. But, my mother is going to have to be strong for herself or find another parent for herself. I just can’t be that anymore.
Today, I woke up and fiddled around on the computer for a while. I scanned my weight watcher booklet and thought about foods. I ate two bananas and then went to Starbuck’s with my husband. I had a latte with non-fat milk and Splenda. We went to Publix and did a little shopping. I am home now and thinking about how much I enjoyed blogging when I was doing it regularly. I miss it.
The kids are watching A Muppet Christmas Carol. I saw Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows yesterday. I am positive and upbeat. Both the children and the husband are off duty until after New Year’s. So, I have a houseful of family and we need to be kind and happy with one another. Some Christmas decorating still needs doing. I don’t really have the holiday spirit right now, but I am not sad about it. Decorating is just a lot of work to put up and then take down again.
Later, I am making a pork tenderloin for dinner. Most likely with corn on the cob and cauliflower. Possibly, we will add a green salad to that. I have romaine, cucumber, and tomato on hand. I have some acorn squash that I have to figure out how to cook into something delicious. I have been going to co-op regularly, at least once a week. Sometimes, I have been twice a week. I am enjoying the work and the food.
I want to be a happy person. I am working on having a positive attitude and I am trying to cut down on the things that I know make me unhappy. *shrug* It could work.